hi.
I have a little tradition with myself each December 6, which I know is St. Nick’s day, but it is also my birthday and here is what I do: I go to Target. I get a medium coffee – black – and I walked the aisles, alone. It is superficial. It is trite. It is so very much a stereotype, and I simply do not care.
I suppose I could blame my Grandpa Lewis, who, every year for my birthday sent me a birthday card, usually with a cardinal on it, and always with a check for “something special.” My Grandpa also sent me money every month I was in college for pizza, and he was the one who told me consistently that I was a writer well before I declared such a bold statement. Anyway, maybe it was because he was a pastor and one of the kindest men on the planet, but I had zero issues buying myself something special because HE SAID TO DO IT. I was just following orders.
Target is where I went, and that’s how the birthday tradition began. I’d always write him and tell him what it was I purchased. One year, I told him that we had a cardinal nearby our condo that banged its head on our sunroom window relentlessly every morning. We suspected it saw its reflection in the glass, and was fighting itself. We didn’t want it to get hurt, so we taped newspaper on the window, and that’s about as nice to nature as I’ve ever been. I wonder what he’d think if he knew I have Corby, who has become without a doubt, my third child. My guess is he’d send a card and a check and suggest I buy Corby something special.
I can’t roam the aisles at Target this year. Jesse, doing his best to honor my melodramatic heartbreak, suggested – gently – that perhaps I could “roam” Target’s website. “Call me Emily Gilmore, but I do not do online shopping,” is what I said.
I’m going to go ahead and be upset about it, but I’m also drawing pictures of how I want to re-do my writing room. I’m trying to learn the difference between what a brand and a platform is. Every morning, after I journal – a bit of a brain dump exercise for myself – I run a mile. I’m doing it for speed. One mile, every day from Thanksgiving to New Year’s Eve, and then, to the basement, where there is a ballet barre, and for 30 minutes I pretend I am a ballerina, and I practice.
My running is slow. I ache everywhere. Jesse came downstairs, saw me practicing jetes, and asked me what I was doing. “I AM GETTING MY CONFIDENCE AND GRACE BACK LEAVE ME ALONE,” is what I told him. But that was just because I was out of breath and self-conscious. What I mean was, I’m doing something special for myself.
Writing last month:
Tomorrow, I will have an essay on Coffee+Crumbs titled, “There Is No Path.” It’s about a lie I told in church, and Jeanne Murray Walker’s poetry, particularly her sonnets in her book, Pilgrim, You Find the Path By Walking.
read well.
I read Caleb Roehrig’s epic The Fell of Dark this month. It is hilarious and fast-paced, and vulnerable. It you’re a “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” fan, if you’re a fan of vampire stories, if you just need a reminder that high school is a terrifying and ridiculous ride but it doesn’t have to end there, get a copy of this book.
The lovely and equally hilarious Melanie Dale has a book ready to devour. (Sorry, vampires and creatures of the night are on my mind – I could blame Mr. Roehrig, but Melanie has had a recurring role as a zombie on “The Walking Dead,” so I think she’d approve of this word as well.) Calm the H*ck Down: How to Let Go and Lighten Up About Parenting is available for pre-order. I was lucky to have read the book earlier this month, and it is equal parts funny and wise. Melanie doesn’t pull any punches, and gets straight to the point, but she’s like that high school teacher or coach who you know no matter what, you can tell anything to. I love knowing her writing.
When Poets Pray by Marilyn McEntyre is a beautiful book intersecting poetry and prayer. It’s a great book for Advent, but I am especially grateful for it because it’s helping me slow down and savor words.
write well.
I am now offering Manuscript and Essay Critiques, something I began over the summer, and is proving to be a fun project. I will read fiction and non-fiction. Click here for details.
Sonya Spillman and I are teaching Reading Well + Writing Well again, and Jenn Batchelor and I will teach Advanced Storytelling. Both courses start in January.
If you’re observing Advent, and would like a journal to accompany you, I have one for you.
Thinking about getting some writing done in 2021? Want to up your game? I have something for that, too. Volume I. Volume II.
local.
Buy local, buy local, buy local! Here are some of my favorites shops in various states:
Thanks for reading,
Callie
reading your words fills me Callie. It really does. Happy Birthday early 🙂